Warning: major rant ...you've been warned.

i am so burned out lately i need a break from the online thing.

i've got people asking me over and over and over when can we meet? there's one guy that messages me all day and all he has to say to me is when are we going to meet? i am so busy with uni and kids and working out and counselling and program sh*t with sponsors and program friends and step work and just trying to get through life i don't have time to be meeting everyone i run into online. ..

i know..you all are busy too..i can't help it if your schedule doesn't match my schedule. that's another thing..i don't have a schedule..i don't know when i will be back or when i'm going to masturbate or when i'll have time to chat. i have enough problems scheduling my real life..this is supposed to be fun and i'm not going to start planning my online time. it's whenever i get done my other sh*t.

it wouldn't be so bad if these guys didn't get so p*ssed off at me when i won't run out and meet them whenever they find it convenient. i wouldn't mind if they asked and left it at that when i said no..but no they feel that it is appropriate to start ripping me apart for it..someone they don't even know.

i have met so many people from online and had so many bad experiences i really don't like wasting a lot of time doing it unless i really think there's some potential there for something i'm looking for. not that i have a f*cking clue what that is these days.

some people say well why don't you just block them. well i do. but sometimes i am actually interested in meeting someone if they would just back the f*ck off for 5min and give me time to figure out when i can fit it in..instead of this constant whining and f*cking complaining. j*sus chr*st. did it not occur to them we could actually be getting to know something about one another instead so that maybe i'm more motivated to meet them when i get the time? no it doesn't so i end up having to block them cause i can't take it anymore.

you don't have to tell me..i know already..i'm a stressed out f*cking bitch that needs to get offline for awhile. well unfortunately i'm an addict so that isn't likely anytime soon.

i get people asking me all pissy like how can i be busy when i have time to be online? umm like none of your f*cking business? umm like cause i have other things i like to do on my pc besides chat maybe??? umm cause i have a couple of close friends that actually want more from me than my c*nt spread on their monitor?

i like playing online. it turns me on majorly when i do it when i want to do it, when it's convenient for me and when i do it how i like to do it. if it's not what you like then find someone that likes what you do. i don't enjoy playing 1 on 1. sorry, did it for years, sick of it, and sick of how possessive and pissy people get when you start one on oneing with them. not that it matters cause it doesn't do anything for me. if i want one on one i'll have real sex with someone.

i get slammed so bad for saying sh*t like this. i rarely let people know how i feel and i will probably delete this post by tomorrow..oops it is tomorrow already..damn. of course it's not everyone that is like this. it's a few idiots that drive me so nuts i wanna scream. then all you Dom types tell me to relax, ignore the idiots and block them...sheeeesh..like how easy that would be if i WAS Dom.. ;) i get so stressed out cause i do like to please people and i like to make people happy. it took me awhile to realise that i will go nuts if i do everything asked of me online by everyone doing the asking. as a good friend pointed out, i need to get something back and i don't.

i show off, alot of people like it, i like the attention..simple.

anyway, i'm just a f*cking bitch tonight. probably cause i am long overdue for a good hard f*cking along with a nice hard spanking.

oh yea and if one more person tells me i should be grateful they find me attractive enough to harrass i will scream. should i thank the guy that assaulted me for finding me attractive enough to assault? i'll start on my thank you cards now.

i just want to do what i want to do when i want to do it. how unsubmissive of me..

okay i'm done..i think.

comments not welcome. :P