Thx CBV...

Well that was f*ckin fast. Saw the guy twice and he's done already. Actually i don't even know what the f*ck is going on. He f*ckin love bombs me for two days straight then poof he's gone... disappeared off the face of the earth.

He calls me ten times a day for two days once he get my phone number. I go over two nites in a row to his house. I sleep there the second nite... and get this we haven't had sex yet.

Anyway, we wake up a couple days ago, he goes to work and i go home... he phones me once after i leave his place and tells me to call him when i wake up... i've never heard from him since and he won't answer his phone.

I am completely f*cking mystified. I don't know what the f*ck is going on. He's got a lot of clean time... he shouldn't be acting like this... and to do it to someone with as little clean time as i've got... well he should know alot better than to act this way.

You don't hang out in the program for that many years and learn nothing about how to treat people right. And to come on that strong for two days then disappear... well i'm f*ckin twisted like you wouldn't f*ckin believe. It's been two days of him having nothing to do with me and i'm just starting to come out of it a little now.

I mean j*sus... the guy's telling me how much he likes me and how he's liked me since the first day he saw me a couple years ago... and he's been looking for someone like me and with kids and i have great t*ts... lol... anyway you get the idea... i mean there was just no end to how much he's letting me know he wants to see me. Then poof.

I don't f*ckin get it. I can't take this sh*t... this f*cks me up to badly.

Just when i was starting to be okay with being alone and someone from my program asks me out. Weird how that works. He's got alot more clean time than me so hopefully we can be sane about seeing each other... :D

I'm pretty excited about the whole thing. It feels really good to be with someone who really likes me and doesn't just want to f*ck me.

It really is quite bizarre. If i didn't know better i'd say he found me on yahoo... found out some of the stuff i like and used it. It's like he knows stuff about me that he couldn't possibly know. Like some of the sexual stuff.

Anyway, i'm too tired to explain it well...

On a completely different note... my kid's father found my other website and is writing abusive stuff so it's all gone. I will probably not be keeping that other nick... so once again... anyone wanting to stay in touch will have to contact me on yahoo before i get rid of it or email me.